geeksotospeak:

99 percent of the times i see a cat, i have to drop whatever the hell i’m doing and acknowledge that there’s a cat and say hi to the cat and walk up to the cat and try to pet the cat

 Say cat again

(Source: geeksotospeak-inactive, via greenumbrellatrees)

jakemalik:

*drops food on floor*

germs: go get it! quick!

king germ: no.. we must wait 5 seconds.. it is the rule

(via taeminfegit)

convolutedscience:

assiest:

double standards disgust me. when a guy sleeps with a ton of women he’s a stud but when a girl sleeps with a ton of women she’s a lesbian

That was not the way I expected that sentence to end.

(via thepolishtomato)

egobus:

  • makes post
  • waits 2 seconds 
  • no notes 
  • deletes post 
  • packs bags 
  • leaves home 
  • builds new life in woods
  • lives with shame forever  
  • lots of shame 
  • like 6 shame 

(via arspop)